BLOGMAS Day 15: It’s a lot!

I did not initially intend to have this piece go up or even write it at all but I just feel so overwhelmed that I just have to somehow express my thoughts and feelings. Yesterday was a difficult day for many people; at least from how I saw people sharing online. People seemed pretty surprised at how someone who was seemingly happy opted to ‘ self transition’ ( I like this more than the other s word). So, I will be sharing just a bit on ‘self transitioning’ so if you are not in a position to keep reading, it’s okay, you can stop here.

My TikTok, ever since yesterday has just been showing me tons of the videos that Twitch had uploaded and I just don’t know how I feel about that. It’s just almost like for some reason that is what the algorithm is pushing or videos of everyone saying you never know what someone is going through, check on your happy and strong friends etc.

I think I loosely agree with that but then the fact that this is usually the messaging after such things happen kinda still makes me unsettled in a way.

Might be getting controversial here…

But then sometimes I also think, to some extent when we are telling people to always seek help and not self-transition we kinda think we have the ability to somehow just ‘talk them out of it’ and things would be okay. I also feel like we make it about us in a way, seeing ourselves as either being the ones most affected or having to live with guilt (again because we think we could have prevented it).

I think it is way more complex than that. It’s more than ‘how could I show them that they were loved’ or whatever else sentiment really.

There is this article I came across a while back and I honestly think everyone should it read, if not for nothing, but for the sake of perspective.

https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/losing-someone-to-suicide

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